[GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]

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A.I.
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Post[GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]
by A.I. » Tue Sep 16, 2008 6:18 pm

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Anonymous wrote: strawberry float YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES. OK!!! DEAL WITH IT.

Writing this will be like Amy Winehouse in some respects; ridiculous and oh so wasted. You know I like computer games; I’ve been a computer gaming forum member for many years. (Slap that on my CV, baby) but did you know I have all three consoles veiled in the dark shadows of an Ikea unit? Or that I could afford a brand new car with what I have spent on video game purchases in the past five years? Or that I speed dangerously to get home just to update my PS3 so that I can get an invisible cup on a TV screen for getting 100,000 points? And yet for some bonkers reason, I’m afraid of anyone knowing. Please don’t tell anyone.

I am a…G…

I think being homosexual must be easier than being a gamer nowadays. Gays and Lesbians have pride marches through the biggest cities in the world. Full of satisfaction, colour and life. A parade dedicated to being your true self and strawberry float to anyone who denies you. Imagine if gamers had that. Marching through Notting Hill dressed as Pac-Man, Snake and Link. Somehow I don’t think so. All we have is a once a year, abbreviated convention tucked away in a big hall in LA with the air con on full blast as the local authorities hope that our collective BO won’t cause a sudden Tsunami somewhere in the world. And even that’s been trimmed down in recent years.

I am a…Gaa a Gaaa… Nope.

Imagine Nintendo’s sales figures being discussed as part of a chat up line, or Red Ring of Death on a first date (unless some anal in on the cards) or when was HOME going to be released on PS3 over a dinner party. Like an overweight gamer wearing a Space Invaders T Shirt, it just doesn’t fit does it. Put football or music or films in there and they would so why not games? Where does my number one hobby fit then? Is there a place to discuss it freely? I guess the smaller the hobby, the less confident you are about it being part of your life.

So I ask myself, how can I make others accept it when I can’t accept it myself? Why am I embarrassed when approaching a girl at the counter of GAME to ask if they do a price match with Argos as its two pounds cheaper but I still want the points? (Nothing makes the girls wetter than buying a cheap version of Sega Superstar Tennis.)

Another pathetic experience was once, just like Mr Brooker, I found myself trying to pretend to a middle aged Tesco employee, I wasn’t queuing until midnight for an Xbox 360 in their closed down coffee shop for myself, Oh no! I was there for my totally fictional and made up nine-year-old brother who has his heart set on it for Christmas. “I can’t let him down,” I told her. “What sort of brother would I be?” She told me in her proudest grandma voice that I was “one of a kind and there wasn’t many left of me in the world”. I had no choice but to agree with her.

As I sat bored out of my brain, with a well thumbed copy of EDGE magazine I had purchased to “find out what all this ‘three-hundred and sixty’ fuss was about”, there were two other gamers sat to the side of me in the coffee shop. I could tell they were gamers by a) they were queuing for an Xbox360 at 10.57pm on a Thursday and b) they were WiFi’ing a game of Pro Evo. On their PSPs! In Public! “How brave” I thought looking round to see if someone could see them. Suddenly, as one of them scored a goal, a quick blast of ‘Yessss’ rang out and my heart yearned. I wanted to be like them. I wanted to be out as gamer. I wanted to march up and declare the sham of my behaviour of the night, be proud that the console was for me and we would embrace. Like only gamers can. But I just hid behind my snobby weakness and fiddled with my phone and I played Snake. Got my second best score. Ever. Yay.

I am a Gaaamm. I am…a Gammmmm. Grr.

So why am I ashamed? Is it the past? Is it the present? It can’t be the Future as prediction won’t alter the current and in addition, GoldenEye was well received by non-gamers (If you got that. I am so, so sorry) So I have sat and pondered and wondered and tried to rationalize and I have come to a reason I cant be proud of my hobby.

Ahem.

I. just. don’t. know.

I’m sorry but it’s true. I honestly do not know. I can’t think of a single reason. The second you find out why I am like I am, tell me please. Which is pretty poor, as all good articles should come to some sort of conclusion shouldn’t they? Which is why this isn’t a good article. It’s a not even an article, some might say. You’ve learnt nothing and quite clearly, neither have I. There is no analysis. No insight. Not even a drop of cohesion. This is for me. This is my first step. It’s my confession.

I am a gamer. And I know not alone.


All comments and feedback welcome. Thank you.

Last edited by A.I. on Wed Sep 17, 2008 5:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Captain Kinopio
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PostRe: [GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]
by Captain Kinopio » Tue Sep 16, 2008 7:19 pm

Really liked this one.

I thought it got a little bit muddled at the end and I spotted one grammatical error but other than that very nice stuff :)

Time for adventure
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Hero of Canton
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PostRe: [GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]
by Hero of Canton » Wed Sep 17, 2008 12:39 am

Herb wrote:Really liked this one.

I thought it got a little bit muddled at the end and I spotted one grammatical error but other than that very nice stuff :)


:fp:

I can empathise with the writer of this piece, and I imagine it will strike a chord with quite a few people. Sadly, the grammar lets things down and the construction of the article isn't quite right (please, please don't just say "oh God, this is crap" - this has happened in a couple of pieces now). An enjoyable enough read, but not good enough to win one of my votes. Sorry.

DML wrote:F'NARR!
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Pilch
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PostRe: [GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]
by Pilch » Wed Sep 17, 2008 2:22 am

I really like the idea behind this piece - it's something I can definitely relate to. As Eighty keeps mentioning, a simple read-through would probably have helped quite a bit before submitting it - there are loads of typos that could easily have been avoided. The content's not at all bad and, disregarding the grammatical issues, it's pretty well written. Nice one!

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Kinetic
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PostRe: [GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]
by Kinetic » Wed Sep 17, 2008 11:27 am

Pilch's comment echoes my thoughts rather nicely. There're (sorry Eight) a lot of positives to be taken from this piece; it's an interesting idea, it flows relatively well, has a nice tone and is, in places, rather well written. I'm also a big fan of the 'I'm a Ga...Gam...' repetition which I thought worked really well and of course, it's very easily emphasized with, which can be a hard thing to achieve.

That being said, it obviously hasn't been proof read, which considering the work that's gone into it, is unforgivably lazy. Too many grammatical errors and poor sentence choices completely jarr it in places and mean that without a decent edit, this'll struggle to grab one of my votes.

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A.I.
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PostRe: [GRWC8] F**K YOU LIFE. I LIKE COMPUTER GAMES... [Article]
by A.I. » Wed Sep 17, 2008 5:53 pm

Edited on request of author.


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